Police pulls over woman driving 100 mph – her excuse is insane

Police pulls over woman driving 100 mph – her excuse is insane

I respect police officers and I know they have a tough job, but I couldn’t help laughing when I read this story!

A 63 year old lady is speeding down a highway, when she spots a police officer with a speed gun. The officer signals for her to pull over, and then walks over and asks her with a smile.

The officer asks, “Went a little fast there, don’t you think? What’s the rush?”

The lady replies, “I’m late for work.”

“Sure,” says the officer, “what do you do?”

“I’m a rectal distender.”

“A what? A rectal distender? And what is that, exactly?”

“Well, you see, I start by putting a finger in, then another, then I work up to three fingers, four fingers, until the whole hand is in. I work from side to side until I can get both hands in, and then slowly but surely I extend the rectum, until it’s about 6 feet wide.”

“And what the hell do you do with a 6 feet asshole?”

“Give him a speed gun and put him by the side of the road.”

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