Funny story: Dad mocks his wife's body – but her revenge is brilliant

Funny story: Dad mocks his wife’s body – but her revenge is brilliant

Sometimes it’s hard to decide how much to tell your kids when they ask questions. Are they old enough to really understand the answers yet? This is one such story.

A family is sitting around the dinner table. The 9 year old son asks his father, “Dad, all the other boys in school are talking about breasts. How many kinds of breasts are there?”

The father, surprised, answers, “Well, son, there are three kinds of breasts. In her 20s, a woman’s breasts are like melons, round and firm. In her 30s to 40s, they are like pears, still nice but hanging a bit. After 50, they are like onions.”

“Onions?”

“Yes, you see them and they make you cry.”

This infuriated the wife and daughter. So the daughter asked, “Mom, how many kinds of penises are there?”

The mother, surprised, smiles and looks at her daughter and answers, “Well dear, a man goes through three phases. In a man’s 20s, his penis is like an oak tree, mighty and hard. In his 30s and 40s, it is a birch, flexible but reliable. After his 50s, it’s like a Christmas tree.”

“A Christmas tree?”

“Yes, dead from the root up and the balls are for decoration only!”

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