Beer – there’s nothing quite like it. A friend of mine once said “I can’t believe good beer tastes so gloriously, it still surprises me every time”.
But just like with all other relationships, sometimes you need a reminder as to why you started liking beer to begin with.
Here’s a list of 49 reasons why beer is better than a girlfriend.
1. Beer is never late.
2. A hangover will disappear by itself.
3. A beer doesn’t get jealous when you take another.
4. If you go to a pub, you can never fail to get a beer.
5. Beer never has a headache.
6. Beer is never too tired.
7. You don’t have to keep fixing things for a beer.
8. A beer doesn’t need perfume to smell good.
9. A beer can only make you feel good.
10. A beer seldom costs more than 6 dollars and never leaves you thirsty.
11. Beer doesn’t call you once a month to brag about its new guy.
12. Beer doesn’t come with any in-laws.
13. Beer always patiently waits for you without complaint.
14. When a beer loses its special something, you throw it away.
15. When the beer runs out, you can make a few cents on the deposit.
16. Beer doesn’t need a lot of space. It’s content just chillin’ in the closet.
17. Beer doesn’t complain about you driving too fast.
18. Beer doesn’t tell you to change the channel to some reality show.
19. Big beers that can you sip for a good while are heaven.
20. You can enjoy several beers in one night.
21. You can share your beer with your friends.
22. You can enjoy a beer in public.
23. Beer always listens and never argues.
24. Beer never cries, it only froths.
25. Beer never asks you “Do I look fat?”
26. Beer doesn’t care if you’re wrong.
27. If you get another beer you don’t need to worry about who’s going to pop up on caller ID.
28. You don’t need to spend a whole evening explaining to a beer why sports is exciting.
29. Beer doesn’t complain about the toilet seat not being down.
30. Beer doesn’t nag you about putting on the seat belt before you’ve even started the car.
31. Beer doesn’t care if you smoke in your car.
32. Beer doesn’t disappear with all your credit cards.
33. Beer doesn’t have a lawyer.
34. Beer doesn’t sulk.
35. Beer knows that sports is real culture.
36. Beer doesn’t expect you to pick up your dirty clothes.
37. Beer doesn’t care about the bathroom being a bit messy.
38. Beer stays where you left it.
39. Beer doesn’t give a damn if you surround yourself with other beers.
40. If a beer leaks a bit, it only smells nice.
41. Beer isn’t a feminist activist and doesn’t go on for hours about patriarchal oppression.
42. Beer is ready to go at the time you planned.
43. Beer tastes good.
44. When you’re done with a beer, then the idea of having another doesn’t make you feel sick.
45. A beer doesn’t complain when you take it to the cinema to see For a Few Dollars More.
46. A beer doesn’t complain when you go on a guy’s night out (to see the above movie without her).
47. A beer doesn’t complain about its exes.
48. A beer always satisfies you.
49. You can bring a beer anywhere.
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